Things Across My Mind...

Its 1.13am and I'm supposed to sleep. But because I slept at 7 sumthing and woke up and 10.30pm, I couldnt close my eyes anymore. Kinda wide awake now. No idea what to do because I just finished typing out the linguistics assignment to send to Jerry. A bit sleepy dy but still I'm online again as usual. Listening to songs to ease up a bit as usual :)

When I look around me now in the living room of my house, I realised how much I had missed home. I never like sitting at home last time. Driving out to the library, to school, to hang out with friends and never bother staying home. Now I realised how much I missed my home. Tanjung Malim kills me much. If its as comfortable and safe as home, I dont mind staying there, but it isnt. Its not comfortable, its not safe and its not convenient at all.

But being there makes me more independant but seems like I didnt change much anyway. I was strong and had been stronger. Form 6 life drives me crazy and I learnt a lot from it especially from the friends that I fought with and the teachers I argued with. Tiny scars combined making a big one. The bigger the scar, the more I learn to be strong and confident. I can just say, " I DONT NEED YOU, YOU AND YOU!" but thats not true. No matter how strong and confident I am, I still need my circle of friends. I had made awesome friends in UPSI and I'm definitely keeping them for eternity. Everyone needs somebody. I need somebody =)

I may be strong in taking sharp harsh words but it doesnt mean my tears wont flow out of my very eyes and it also doesnt mean I'm not hurt. Ill feel that short tinge of pain but because I'm too used to getting hurt that I feel my heart is made up of half steel. I'm afraid that I might turn into someone not loving and caring anymore as my heart is half sealed up. I do not want to not be able to feel anymore. Its bad. I guess I still dont mind keep getting hurt and fall and cry and stand up again and get hurt and cry and stand up again. Thats the way to be stronger and also being able to feel the pain, love or happiness...whichever concerns =)

Many things are running in my mind right now and I just want to express how much I had fun these few days with Ravina, Yvonne, Rowena and Edwin. I actually observe much and learn a lot about them. I wont tell a thing even if they ask. But in Ravina's case, there's nothing to learn because Ive seen much of her and I spend almost every minute with her in class and KZ. Hahaha. I know her well enough. LOL. Trying my best to make their trip to Ipoh memorable =) I dont know if they really had fun but I tried my best. Never left my guest unattended =))

I think I should stop before I get all touchy and emotional. LOL.
I almost never had emotional posts. Just once in a while.
Bye~